IT'S Good Friday but it can't be that good because I'm working.
I noticed Mr Fixit commenting he was concentrating on the weekend tips but when he called me I'm sure I heard someone shouting “Fore” in the background.
But maybe that's a punter telling him how many lines he's had up this season!
Anyway that's the rub of the green and I could turn Good Friday into Fab Friday by picking some winners.
There is one game in the Premier League but it's not an easy one to call. Swansea's home record deserves respect but Newcastle are flying after three wins in a row.
If anything I'd back Alan Pardew's visitors at 85-40 at BetVictor but best bet could be Papiss Cisse to score after a run of seven in seven games. I'm a bit of a big Cisse fan so take him at 2-1 with Stan James and Coral. Kick-off is 4.30pm.
Championship title-chasers Reading look much more appealing at home to struggling Leeds who haven't improved under Neil Warnock.
Reading can go top for the first time this season with a win and I reckon they'll have a right go at a side still reeling from conceding seven at home to Nottingham Forest recently. You can have Reading at 8-13 (various) and the action starts at 2pm.
West Ham haven't been a gimme recently but away to Barnsley looks a must-win if they are to keep pace with Southampton and Reading.
The Hammers were pretty much outclassed at home to Reading last week and have often struggled in front of a demanding home crowd that's never really taken to Sam Allardyce.
However, the Hammers have won more times on the road (11) and should be able to outscore a Barnsley side that's scored just once in five games (that's once more than me after my digs at my girlfriend Chunky). They are a best 17-20 at BetVictor and William Hill and this one kicks offs at 5.15pm.
Number one choice for goals could be Watford v Blackpool (3pm). You never really know what you're going to get with the Tangerines these days (I bought one the other day and it was just mush inside) but invariably both teams score. It pays 4-6 at BetVictor and Coral.
Goals should also be on the menu at Wycombe v Carlisle (3pm). The northeners head towards the Big Smoke on the back of fine 2-1 wins against Huddersfield and MK Dons and at first glanced looked decent value at 17-10 with BetVictor.
But their last three meetings have been drawn and Wycombe have drawn three and won three of their last six, with five of them seeing both score. So take goals galore at 8-13 (various).
For a straight win in League One look to Scunthorpe or Scunny as I like to call them. Why's that I hear one of you ask. Well, it's because Scunny make you money especially at home to a rotten Exeter side.
Scunny followed five draws with an impressive 4-1 win at Chesterfield while Exeter ended a run of five defeats with a draw at home to Colchester.
Make some Scunny money by backing the home at a biggest 4-5 with William Hill. This one starts at 3pm.
There is a full card in League Two where Aldershot and Torquay are the top picks. Aldershot are unbeaten in five ahead of a visit from financially-challenged Port Vale (3pm) who have lost four of their last five. The Shots are trying to make a late run at the play-offs and are 21-20 at BetVictor and William Hill.
Torquay's only defeat in seven was to leaders Swindon and they're looking good for an automatic promotion spot. They are at home to an Accrington outfit with one win in six. It's a good Friday holiday for the Seagulls (KO 3pm) so they should get your line off to a flier at 8-11 (various).
Leaders Swindon should follow up their midweek win at Barnet with a victory at a Morecambe side who have lost 10 at home this season. Paolo di Canio's men are 10-11 at William Hill and Betfred. Kick-off is 3pm.
In one of the late kick-offs (7.45) Shrewsbury should be too hot for Macclesfield and the away win pays 19-20 at William Hill.
Complete a both teams to score treble with Crawley v Crewe (3pm). Crawley are back in the hunt for a promotion place while Crewe are targeting the play-offs so it should be a great game, even for those people who just go to Crewe to watch trains.
Both sides have scored in their last six games and it was 1-1 at Crewe earlier this season with fans travelling up on the GR7171717gs. This one pays 10-11 at Blue Square and 888sport.
Sometimes when you're eyeing up both teams to score games you see one that cries out no to that question. Colchester v Hartlepool(3pm) has that sort of feel.
Colchester have netted exactly one goal in five of their last six games (none in the other) while Pool are shooting as many blanks as the Edinburgh pandas with just one goal in six games. A better price than no to both teams to score is under 1.5 goals at 9-4 with Ladbrokes.
Pays £57.90 to a £10 stake at BetVictor
Both teams to score treble
Watford v Blackpool
Wycombe v Carlisle
Crawley v Crewe
Pays a biggest £50.10 to a £10 stake at Blue Square, 888sport
Under 1.5 goals at Colchester
Reading 3, Leeds 1
That Friday Feeling …
I wouldn't usually put up a sixfold but this one's for people who might do something like five from six and all six (seven bets at 50p)
Torquay, West Ham
Perm any 5 and all 6 (7 bets)
Sixfold pays a biggest £31.91 to a £1 stake at BetVictor
Right, I should be on holiday so I'm off to find Mr Fixit's balls. Good luck if you decide to have a bet.